Why two-year-olds are hilarious

OK so sorry to all my AP friends who already read this post but to everyone else these are some of my favorite one-liners from the last few months.

Lyric wakes up one morning and takes a big deep inhale of our sheets and says, "Mmmmm this bed smells like everyone I love."

That warm fuzzy feeling lasted a few days until:
L "If I had hairy armpits like you I'd shave it off."
M "Why is that?"
L "I'm pretty sure thats the part that makes you smell like an ogre."

L "Mom are you a people?"
M "Yeah I'm a person are you a person?"
L "I'm a person on the outside and a penguin in my heart."
M "I wonder what it feels like to be a penguin in your heart?"
L "Cold and fishy."

L "I love Daddy and Kaliya loves you."
M "I love all of you and think you love me too."
L "I'll think about it and send you an email."

L "I just peed on your floor"
M "WHy?"
L "I forgot I'm not a puppy.

From the bathroom one day , "COde brown code brown someone better come wipe this ass." Honestly I have no idea where that one came from.

And my all time favorite was one night when Kaliya was being a bugger for hours on end in the middle of the night. Frustrated I say to Lyric at about 4am, "Ugh should I just go put her downstairs in the swing by herself?" COmpletely disgusted by my idea she replied, "That idea doesn't have enough love for a baby. Give her to me." So I pass her over and within 10 minutes we are all settled to sleep.